Last week I commented on the guise defined by others as to how we as Black men look, behave, believe, interact with others, in order to fit an image that can be lived with, and controlled by, those who do not look like us. Two questions immediately arise: Why does this matter? Why should we spend so much time and energy agitating against such distortion?
The answers are simple. The distortion matters because without contradiction it becomes taken as fact by those who do not know nor wish to know the reality of our lives and our lived experience. The time and energy devoted to rightly fighting against such calumny is justified in an attempt to assert our rights to autonomy, self- definition, self-defined worth, and anti-colonialism.
From my day to day contact with other Black men I see beauty and grace, wonderful abilities at relationship building, often high degrees of vulnerability and sensitivity, intelligence, hard work both at our paid daily occupations if we have one, and in our leisure time, reaching the pinnacles of various professions and trades. There is a profound belief in the value of family, not just the one we were born into, but the one we create through life with the addition of friends, valued colleagues, lovers and other individuals who made an impact on our lives.
This does not ignore those of us who do not seem to reflect what I have just outlined. Who is to say that it cannot be achieved? Those brothers are my own. I am linked to them whether they recognise it or not. I will extend my hand on this ladder of life and grasp the hesitant hand waiting. I will not fail you. That is what we do as Black men even though at times we need to be reminded by personal life experience.
This weekend was a perfect example of what I am alluding to. I was privileged to attend last evening, Saturday, January 14th 2017, A Musical tribute to Rev. Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. and the Cultural Awareness Group, at Dalhousie University Arts Centre, Rebecca Cohn Auditorium Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. The event featured the Nova Scotia Mass Choir and guest appearances by Know Thy Self (KTS) Stomp Group, Lorraine Novalee Buchan, Mark Riley and Woody Woods, Guest musical conductor.
Whilst listening to this wonderful wall of sound I was reminded of echoes: experiences, feelings, images, people, challenges, successes, reflected momentarily from this surface, searching for acknowledgement and respect. Underpinning this was the majesty of the unique quality and beauty of the Black voice searching for echoes. Waiting for recognition and appreciation of its importance in the formation of Black identity. It patiently waited for a response.
The response came. It said, look to yourself and mould yourself using the lessons and wisdom derived from your personal history and that of your ancestors. Build on that and excel in your own unique way.
I was being told that too much time was being spent on what other people think of us. What was of much more urgent importance was our opinion of what we thought and how we can attain the vision of ourselves we aspire to if we feel at times it falls short of what we currently look like. I am not saying that we should ignore what others think, but we should not privilege that version of us above what we honestly know is our actual reality and the circumstances which may have shaped that. We know our reality because we live it day to day. We are clothed by it. We breathe it and negotiate it, minute- by minute, hour by hour. We are the ultimate authority on our lived experience.
James Baldwin (1924-1987), who I have quoted before in my blog, makes the important point that the images of us as Black people used by those who are not Black, have a purpose. Our energies should be devoted to understanding ‘…the way that a country and its society works. How to find my way around it, not get lost in it, and not feel rejected by it’. There is currently a disproportionate amount of time spent on correcting deliberate negativity and insufficient energies devoted to developing ourselves in ways that project our actual and potential contribution to society.
In next week’s blog I will look at some examples of Black male excellence.