In last week’s brief article I stated that we must not take credit for, and capitalise on, the sacrifices and successes of others as if we had played some active part in them. We must make our own sacrifices and create our own successes, building on the past certainly towards forging a brighter present and a more promising tomorrow. At times this is very difficult to do when we feel so unprepared, unskilled, lacking in confidence and spending all our time attempting to survive in the present.
How we see ourselves, our intimate honest opinions of how we are as individuals, and our assessments of our self-worth, are critical as a first step in moving forward. Who am I? What do I have to offer, to myself, and to others? One of the most painful experiences and indeed one of the most frightening is to be in the company of someone, who feels worthless, unloved, and unappreciated. The outcome is rarely positive. Supporting one another, and helping to lift each other to a higher plane, should be our goals.
The FRIENDS program which I ended last week’s blog on, is shorthand for:
- ‘Feelings’ (being aware of one’s own feelings and those of others)
- ‘Relaxation techniques’ (learning to relax when stressed)
- ‘Inner thoughts’ (being alert to how we can think about ourselves and the world around us that can produce anxiety)
- ‘Exploring solutions and coping plans’
- ‘Nice Work’. Reward yourself.
- ‘Don’t forget to practice (the skills learnt for use outside the FRIENDS group of participants)
- ‘Stay calm or smile’
The FRIENDS program is conducted in small groups to increase peer bonding and interaction, and also has parent involvement to assist them in increasing their ability to relate to their children and support them in their learning. In summary, FRIENDS attempts to equip children and youth with the tools to function successfully within their often grossly inadequate surroundings. In addition, the skills and attitudes learnt in the program lasted up to three years after their introduction.
Cited in Schneider (2014)
[Shortt, A., Barrett, P., and Fox, T (2001). Evaluating the FRIENDS program: A cognitive-behavioural group treatment of childhood anxiety disorders. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 30 (4), 523-533
Lowry-Webster, H., Barrett, P., and Lock, S. (2003). A universal prevention trial of anxiety symptomatology during childhood: Results at one- year follow- up. Behaviour Change, 20 (1), 25-43
Barrett, P. M., Farrell, L. J., Ollendick, T. H., and Dadds, M. (2006). Long –term outcomes of an Australian universal prevention trial of anxiety and depression symptoms in children and youth: An evaluation of the FRIENDS program. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 35(3), 403-411]
Similar evidence-based initiatives that work are available in Substance use and misuse, Suspensions and Dropouts from school, and in dramatically reducing youth contact with the Criminal- Justice system. The question however is why are they not used to influence policy and practice in the HRM?
In conclusion, I had the privilege over a significant period as a consultant, to work with two major programs of urban regeneration in London, UK: Stonebridge Housing Action Trust, and the London Borough of Newham. The latter was related to community safety in its Tower blocks where hundreds of residents lived, whose rooftops were being vandalised to install ‘pirate’ (illegal) radio stations. What struck me about the two initiatives was the determination of the political leadership, Central government and Local government respectively, to make a difference in the lives of the population that elected them. Tenants in the communities affected had endured years of neglect, indifference, lack of efficient services, insufficient support, crime, vandalism, housing disrepair and the story goes on. In short, you did not wish to live in the affected neighbourhoods unless you had no choice. That lack of choice and feeling of being isolated and placed in a ‘ghetto’ added to the distinct impression of being disposable: not part of the wider society.
After genuine consultation with the communities’ involved- and the communities were increasingly seen as legitimate partners holding the Authorities to account, major reconstruction took place. Not only of the units in which tenants lived, but, throughout the environmental space in which the living accommodation was located. The result was a transformation from an area identified as undesirable, to a sought after neighbourhood to live in: all at affordable rents. Crime was essentially designed out to a minimum. Housing management was competent and held to standards monitored by the community. Residents took increasing pride in ensuring that the area they lived in remained safe, secure, caring and that those who needed support and guidance, and occasionally held to account for their actions, received it.
We, as members of the community, must play our part as the last two verses of the poem by Maya Angelou outlines, in, Still I Rise:
‘Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.’
In my next blog on January 1st, 2017, I will start a series on Men, in particular, Black and Ethnic Minority Men, and what is special about us?